With an Ageless Attitude You’re Never Too Old

Posted on May 15, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

With an Ageless Attitude Your Never Too OldIt seems as though there’s a common fear among women as they age; that they have an expiration date and once they reach a certain point in time they’re too old.  Too old to try new things, go on grand adventures, start new careers, or live the life of their dreams.

We’ve never really bought into that way of thinking.  Perhaps it’s because within our midst is a real-life example that debunks this limiting belief; our own mother, Rita.

Shortly after Mom turned 60, she and Dad sold their farmstead of 30 years, got rid of most of their belongings, purchased a massive RV and hit the road with nothing but a compass and possibility ahead of them.  When they announced their plans it wasn’t hard to imagine Dad loving life on the road, but Mom?  She was more of the stay at home and tend to the garden type.  But, it’s been over 7 years now and together they’ve had enough adventures to prove to anyone that you’re never too old.

While they still summer back at the farm, the rest of the year is spent touring the highways and byways of the country and volunteering for the Texas State Park System.  They’ve been east and been west, visited what we believe to be a record number of wineries, walked battlefields and toured mansions, and never leave a state without stopping at the Presidential library, if there is one. Some of their escapades make us extremely nervous and we remind them that we’re not made of money and should they be kidnapped while exploring those remote towns in Mexico, we’re not quite sure how we would pay?!

Their State Park stories make us a bit anxious, too.  The long hikes on rough terrain setting trail markers is very physically demanding, even for the much younger park rangers, let alone a couple of 60 something gringos.  Still, they send back pictures of the group, park rangers exhausted and resting in the shade, Mom and Dad in wide brimmed hats, spry as always and smiling from ear to ear.

You can image our surprise when Mom announced she and Dad would be taking a 4 day tour across the Rio Grande into the mountains of Mexico, on mules no less.  Mules?  Yes, the extremely steep and rough terrain was too much for most horses.  Mules could navigate the rugged country much better.  And so they went, and rode, and had a great time.  We picture their adventure to be a little like Billy Crystal and the gang in City Slickers.  They say it was a full trip, riding up to 25 miles a day, but that they hope to do it again, sore butts and all.

And who can forget white water rafting on the Rio Grande.  The white water was no match for Mom.  Five hours were spent navigating the river along with a guide.  The areas of rapids were a little threatening to them at first but it didn’t take very long at all before they had the hang of it.  They also were able to experience rafting through multiple narrow gorges, too.  And as they glanced up they couldn’t help but notice stranded vehicles perched along the side wall.  Cars that had driven off the road up above and it was too dangerous for any rescue personnel to pull them back out, so there they stayed.  Yikes is right!

But the adventure to beat all, and one that makes us wish we could implant a tracking device into each, consisted of them setting out through the Texas dessert to look for ancient hieroglyphics.  They had heard about them from a park ranger and listened intently as he described the location.  On their next day off they packed up their Jeep and set out across unkempt roads (later we would learn a cactus spine had actually lodged into the tire of their vehicle but they made it all the way back to Wisconsin before the tire began to leak!).

After hours of driving they finally arrived at their destination, a sheer rocky cliff.  Not exactly as they envisioned, and not prepared with any type of climbing gear, they stopped for a moment to question if they should really continue.

Well, since others had done it, they certainly could too and so they set out up the rock face.  Carefully climbing but enjoying every minute.  Upon reaching the top and discovering the ancient drawings, they decided their climb was definitely worth it; a view of untouched history.  The hieroglyphics were amazingly preserved within the recesses of the cliff.  And the view of the mountainous dessert, well that was amazing too.

But then came the even more difficult task of climbing down.  Thankfully they made it back safe and sound and reported back to the park ranger about how amazing their day was.  With wide eyes the ranger replied, “What?!  No one climbs up there!  How did you even make it?!”

Thanks for being such a positive influence on us Mom!  We may not be quite as adventurous as you, but we haven’t given up on ourselves yet!  You’ve proven to us that there’s plenty of time for wild escapades and thrilling explorations.  But more important is this lesson:  Age isn’t a number, and it has nothing to do with how you feel…it’s more of an attitude and yours is ageless.  We love you!

The Soul Sisters

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Just in Time for Mother’s Day: Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms

Posted on May 8, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

Through the power of social media, and a series of coincidences (if that’s indeed what they were), we were fortunate to connect with Kristine Carlson, wife of the late Richard Carlson who authored the best selling “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff” books, three of which were co-authored by Kristine herself.  Her book, “Heartbroken Open: A Memoir Through Loss to Self-Discovery” has helped many cope with the grief of losing a loved one, members of our own families included.

So when we heard she was continuing the tradition of “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff” and writing a book for moms, we waited and followed with intense anticipation.  As followers of Kristine’s Facebook page we were continuously amazed by her deep, reflective, spiritual approach to life and living.  Authentic and vulnerable, she shares openly about the triumphs and tragedies of her life, spreading faith, hope, wisdom, and humor along the way.

We were fortunate to receive a pre-release copy of “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms: Simple Ways to Stress Less and Enjoy Your Family More” and immediately knew it was a winner; hundreds of anecdotes, lessons, wisdom and advice written specifically for moms by a mom.  Nearly every aspect of mothering and family are addressed in the book in some fashion – from self-care and taking care of yourself first, to heavier topics such as the emotional safety of our children, to the more practical topics of living “green” and teaching your children financial responsibility.  What we especially love about the book is how Kristin broke it down into 100 short chapters…clearly as a mom, she understands that time is sometimes only available in small chunks.  “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms” is easy to pick up and read whenever you get a free moment.  Plus, all the advice is simple enough that it can be easily applied to our lives immediately.  Brilliant!

True to the title, Kristine puts all anxiety, stress and pressure about motherhood into perspective.  Throughout the book important themes repeat: It’s all okay, it’s acceptable and necessary to take time for yourself, perfection is over-rated, you can seek out help from others, etc.  As moms we tend to visualize the picture of that perfect mom in our heads, and we are constantly striving for that…it’s unattainable and leaves us feeling burned out, unhappy, and feeling as though we have failed.

Finally, the significance, magnitude and understanding of what it takes to excel at motherhood has been eloquently translated into written-word.  It’s easy for mom’s to feel underappreciated by society, as was exemplified by the back-and-forth after Hilary Rosen’s comments in regards to Ann Romney’s decision to raise her five boys as a full-time mom.  It’s gratifying to see it in writing.  Moms are the heart of the home, the leader of the family, the orchestrator of the schedules…finally someone noticed!

But is motherhood everything?  As Kristine states, “I’m still devoted to family, but I am not confined by that role.”  Many mothers get themselves into trouble by placing their entire focus on family.  They are doing themselves a disservice by underestimating the importance of their personal goals, interests and passions.  Had Kristine subscribed to that philosophy, we wouldn’t have this amazing guidebook to a more relaxed form of motherhood.

Early on in the book, Kristine shared the oxygen mask/flight attendant metaphor.  Anyone who’s flown on an airplane and has listened to the flight attendant’s instructions will relate; “In the unlikely event that air pressure drops within the aircraft, oxygen masks will deploy from the ceiling.” You’re then instructed to put the oxygen mask on yourself before assisting others, even your children.  The logic is clear; if you’ve passed out from a lack of oxygen, you’re of no use to the people around you.  This sets the stage for the rest of the book.  Over and over again she reiterated that we, as moms, need to feed ourselves first – create a special place for ourselves in our homes, take a “mommy time-out”, plan “rest” time for ourselves each week, etc.

As women, we often seek out the advice of other women.  Here, we are receiving the advice and wisdom of one of the most understanding and grounded moms out there.  You can feel her love, energy, and sensible style with each turn of the page.  She has such an amazing soul and even if a fraction of her advice and wisdom rubs off on us, reading this book and expanding our beliefs about motherhood will make us less stressed moms raising happier kids.

“Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms” is for every mother.  The young moms will find the advice helpful in getting off on the right motherhood foot; asking for help when it’s needed, not holding yourself to crazy standards, and more.  For more experienced moms, it will remind them of how much of a feat being a mom really is and that they should be proud of their accomplishment.  It will also give them permission to reassess how things are running in the home and inspire them to make changes where they feel it’s needed. Practical parenting advice such as taking a breath before responding to a child who is testing your patience is a great reminder to all of us.

Pick up a copy and learn for yourself how you can be happier and stress less as a mom.  Still not convinced?  Kristine had graciously allowed us to share an excerpt from the book, a portion of the chapter, “Empowered Mom”, as the feature article in our May Soulspiration e-newsletter.  We couldn’t think of a better way to commemorate Mother’s Day for our subscribers.  If you’ve yet to join our email list, please sign up today (and claim your free e-book, “50 Reasons to Believe in You”).

The Soul Sisters

P.S. Join the community of Don’t Sweat Moms on Facebook!  Declare that you’re a “Don’t Sweat it Mom” here!

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Growing Grass the Wrong Way

Posted on May 1, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

My husband and I bought our home 10 years ago this November. We were 20 and 23. Uffta, way too young to take on such responsibility! Thank goodness my husband and I had the perfect mix of patience, love, and common sense to see us through!

When we bought our house it was newly built but had been left vacant for over a year. It was exciting to have a “new” house but the yard definitely needed some TLC. Grass was never planted and the lawn was literally a yard full of waist-high weeds. It was November and there was no growing season left for the year. The only option we had was to cut everything down to the ground and tackle the grass situation the following spring.

Five months later my husband decided it was time. Finally some green grass was in the works! The first step was loosening up the dirt and since we had no prior knowledge of anything of this magnitude (we had only cut the stuff before), we relied on our common sense and went to work. Brad put me on a lawn mower and told me to drive in circles while I pulled a “drag”, weighted by a concrete block, behind me. So that’s what I did – round and round. The ground was exceptionally hard but to me that only meant more trips around.

Being that this was spring, the neighbors were making their first appearances outside after their winter hibernating and we were seeing a lot of them for the first time. As I was busy attempting to bust up the dirt, a neighbor gentlemen stopped me, literally, and said, “You’re doing that completely wrong – you’re going to have to get a tiller in here and till up that ground if you ever want anything to grow.”

I was dumbfounded. I couldn’t believe that someone would actually stop to point out that they thought we were doing something “wrong”. I drove to the backyard where Brad was working and told him. He said, “Well, get back up there…now we really need this grass to grow.”

The grass did grow that year in our little plot of land. And all these years later we have one of the best looking lawns on the block! I think back to that man anytime I find myself labeling someone’s process as “wrong”. It’s easy to slip into that “controller” role but just because I would do something differently than someone else, doesn’t make their way any less right. And most of the time their way works out just fine. There’s more than one path to the same destination. It was an important life lesson…There is no sense in spreading negativity by pushing our mistaken ideals on other people.

The Soul Sisters

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From the Perspective of a Dandelion

Posted on April 24, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

From the Perspective of a DandelionOne of my earliest memories was when I was in preschool at the age of 4.  It was May Day and as part of the celebration we transformed cardboard milk containers magically into the most beautiful flower baskets you’ve ever seen.  Before our moms came to pick us up that day we filled our baskets full with blooms picked from the millions of dandelions in the backyard of the school.  We all left with bunches and bunches of the most fabulous yellow flowers.  I’m sure our moms were thrilled.

I’ve always loved dandelions.  You have to admit that it’s kinda nice to see that first pop of bright color every spring.  And when you come across a whole field of the vibrant yellow flowers, you can’t help but smile!  They’re just so cheerful!  Oh, and I can’t forget to mention how fun they are when they turn to white puffballs!  What kid (and sometimes even adult) doesn’t love to blow the dandelion wisps?  I’ve always had the feeling that those tiny seeds carry some sort of magic with them as they take to the wind.

So, yes, I really do enjoy dandelions.

I have to keep my opinion of dandelions rather quiet from my husband though.  He puts hours into removing the “weed” from our lawn.  He (along with many, many others) absolutely despises dandelions.  Where I see them as cheerful and pretty, most see them as a nuisance and are frustrated by their heartiness.  They pre-treat early spring, trying to cut the blooms off at the pass.  Then, when that’s not successful, they spray each individual plant after they show their ugly head.  It’s nearly impossible to stay ahead of them.  And then of course, a different line of defense is necessary if they take up residence in your flower garden.  Spraying would most definitely kill all the legitimate flowers growing there, so this is when it’s necessary to find that really sharp weed digger tool and dig those little monsters up from the root ball.

So, yes, most people hate dandelions.

Perspective is an amazing thing, isn’t it?  An identical object, in this case a dandelion, can be beautiful to one person and a nuisance to another.  And so it goes with anything in life: a situation, a circumstance, a daily occurrence.  While some may look at them as bad, there are always others who would look at them as good.  So what’s the difference?  It all comes down to a decision.  Because of my own perception, I’ve chosen to like dandelions.  And we all have that same power over everything.  So today, instead of deciding to dislike the same old things, choose to look at the silver lining, and find something to like instead.  You’ll have a better day because of it!

The Soul Sisters

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Top 10 Quotations to Inspire Empowered Choices

Posted on April 17, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

Top 10 Quotations to Inspire Empowered ChoicesWe all know them (or maybe you’re the guilty party); those people who are self-proclaimed “indecisive”.  They are the last to choose from the menu at a restaurant, try on 3 differnt outfits before deciding on the perfect one, and choosing the right toothpaste could easily suck up a good twenty minutes of their time.

Being “indecisive” is a personality trait that is often taken pretty lightly, while the contrary is actually true.  Choices are powerful!  With each decision we exert some level of control, and while we may not always like our choices, the final decision is up to us.  We think that’s pretty empowering!

Yes, the decisions we make and our daily choices are very important.  Even the smallest of choices are what pave our paths to the future.  So how can we inspire you to step into your power of choice?

Well, who doesn’t love a good quotation?  Time and again we find it’s a simple quote that draws the most attention on our Facebook page!  We love those short little nuggets of wisdom, and we’ve actually amassed quite a collection!  Below we share our top ten favorite quotations to inspire you to choose…and choose wisely!

Enjoy!

The Soul Sisters

TOP 10 QUOTATIONS TO INSPIRE EMPOWERED CHOICES:

1. “In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt

2. “Don’t get your directions from someone who’s never been where you want to go.” ~Unknown

3. “…to choose well, you must know who you are and what you stand for, where you want to go and why you want to get there.” ~Kofi Annan

4. “I discovered I always have choices and sometimes it’s only a choice of attitude.” ~Unknown

5. “It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” ~Joanne Kathleen Rowling

6. “There are always two choices. Two paths to take. One is easy. And its only reward is that it’s easy.” ~Unknown

7. “When you have to make a choice and don’t make it, that is in itself a choice.” ~William James

8. “When making a decision, focus on what feels “shackles off” versus “shackles on.” ~Martha Beck

9. “It is the big choices we make that set our direction. It is the smallest choices we make that get us to the destination.” ~Shad Helmstetter, Ph.D

10. “You are your choices.” ~Seneca

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Same Old Routine? How to Get Yourself Out of that Rut

Posted on April 10, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

Routines are convenient and have their uses, but sticking to the same-old-same-old, day in and day out, can make life boring, drain your energy and squelch creativity and inspiration!

Don’t let yourself get stuck in a rut…You’ve got too much living to do! That’s why we’ve compiled this simple 6 Day All-Intensive Routine Breaking Program to free you from the tedious, dull, and mundane! By next weekend you’ll feel more alive, energized, creative, and inspired, we guarantee it! Even more important however is the fact that you’ll have a lot of fun while doing it!

6 Day All-Intensive Routine Breaking Program

Monday: Even a simple change can spark creativity! What could you do differently today to change up your usual routine? Today keep it simple; change up your reading habits, your typical eats, your usual route, your workout, etc…

Tuesday: Today your task it to “rearrange”! What you change-up is your choice; rearrange the living room furniture, the top of your desk at work, the drawers in the kitchen, or the seating arrangement at the dinner table.

Wednesday: Review your “morning ritual”. How you start the day sets the tone for the rest of your day. A healthy breakfast, some prayer or journaling time, uplifting music instead of the morning news, might be all it takes to make your day extra great! Punching up your morning could change your life!

Thursday: Review your “evening ritual”. How you end the day is powerful. Be purposeful as you go through your evening and pay attention to what feels right to you; a few yoga poses or some light stretching, tea on the deck, relaxing in the tub, or reading in bed. Whatever brings your day to a proper close is the new routine for you!

Friday: Hang out with a new crowd and experience new ideas, new insights and new points of view! Hey, that sounds like a Souslpring Group! This is the perfect opportunity to join a group or start one of your own!

Saturday: Try a new hobby or recipe, switch sides of the bed, or plan an adventurous outing…the goal today is to spend your Saturday in a new way. Dedicate today to all things NEW!

The Soul Sisters

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Passion and Purpose: Isn’t There an Easier Way?

Posted on April 3, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

In this day of instant everything, so many are seeking a quick way to do, be and have it “now”.  As an organization that helps women find their passions and live life on purpose, we’ve heard it all…Isn’t there a book I can read?  Can I find it on Google?  Don’t they have an assessment for that?

Your passions and your divine assignment for living aren’t something you can learn in a book or find in an internet search, although clues can be found there.  Truly living “on purpose” is a process that requires commitment, self-reflection and determination.  You might even say that when it comes to passion and purpose, living your passion is equally important to finding it.  That adage, “it’s not just the destination, it’s the journey,” definitely applies.

You can’t wait for your passions to reveal themselves to you, or for your life purpose to knock on the door; it’s referred to “pursuing your passion” for a reason.   You have to get out there and try new things, experience different adventures, meet new people, and become aware of new causes, for every aspect of your uniqueness to come together in just the right way.  While this might sound complicated, it doesn’t have to be; with the right perspective, getting there is most of the fun!

It does take creativity though, and dedication.  It’s much easier to let the day-to-day lead you through life.  So, where does one find the inspiration to try new things on the journey to passionate, empowered and purposeful living?

The first place we recommend is your “bucket list”.  Soulspring Groups’ members have several pages in their Soulspring Journal which are dedicated to creating a list of things they want to do before they die (101 to be exact).  We’ve heard of women dedicating themselves to knocking one thing off their list every week!  That’s a pretty aggressive goal, but imagine the thrill!

Another great source can be found on Soulspring Groups’ Facebook page.  Each Friday on Facebook is Springboard Friday; a day where we post a simple activity to carry out (or plan for in the future).  We’ve provided the planning tools, too!  Followers of our page can download them via or Empowerment & Fun tab.

Past activities have included learning CPR.  It’s a skill we all should know and there’s a sense of security that comes with being prepared for an emergency.  Perhaps taking a CPR class could uncover a passion for emergency response?

We also suggested becoming more aware of the nighttime skies.  Learning about the stars is not only fun and interesting; a focus skyward gives us a sense of the greatness around us.  Perhaps being able to identify the constellations would inspire a passion for astrology, or spark a passion in your child for science and space?

Debating on where to go on your summer vacation?  One recent Springboard Friday post suggested throwing a dart at a map and traveling to that destination.  The map could be of your country or state, or even a local map that’s closer to home.  Who knows what you might stumble upon on your adventure…a new company or business you didn’t know existed, a historical site, a remote piece of nature…Each could be a doorway to a new purpose or passion for your life.

It’s time to stop your search for the easy way to discover your passions and the quickest route to your life purpose.  Instead put more attention on what is revealed to you along the way…Take some time to get lost and you might just find yourself.  The lessons, excitement and connections you make on your journey through life will reveal your purpose in due time…that is, if you’re willing to get your hands dirty and start really living.  You can get started right now by making a point to stop by Soulspring Groups’ page on Facebook this Friday for a new passion quest assignment you can get on the calendar for next weekend.

The Soul Sisters

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Question Your Assumptions

Posted on March 27, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

I was watching an episode of Dr. Oz a while back (I love Dr. Oz!) and the topic of the show transitioned to a particular woman who was very unhealthy. They followed her through a typical day which consisted of working a full-time job, taking care of her elderly parents, and doing the stereotypical “wife duties” of shopping, cooking, and cleaning. And on top of all that, she picked up a part-time job to work in the evenings to make ends meet due to her husband being unemployed for many months. This woman’s life made mine look like a vacation, that’s for sure!

Keeping a lifestyle like this was taking its toll, though. She was overweight, not getting enough sleep, over-stressed, suffering from high blood pressure, and the list went on and on.

They then welcomed to the show a professional life coach. Clearly in this woman’s case, she needed to get her life under control before they could work on the food and exercise areas of health. As the coach listed out the steps to take to get her life back to a healthy level, there was one step that particularly stood out to me: Question your Assumptions.

How often are our “have to’s” really things we have to do? We place certain assumptions on how things are supposed to be; what a good parent should do, what a perfect wife should do, what it takes to be successful. It’s easy to play the blame game when we’re stressed, busy, or unhappy. But in most cases we’re probably assuming things need to be a certain way when they really don’t.

What kind of assumptions are you placing on your life? Try this eye-opening exercise for yourself by listing out everything that is putting a strain on you right now. Then self-debate the possibility that they are not necessary. You might just be amazed at what you discover.

The Soul Sisters

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Are You Making the Grade?

Posted on March 20, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

Are You Making the GradeWe are all familiar with the concept of being graded for the efforts we put forth in school. When you took a test you expected a grade as a result. You also received grades for things other than the display of your knowledge in a certain subject. In the early years you may have received a gold star for finishing an assignment, regardless of how accurate your answers were. A value was often times given for class participation, effort, and your respect toward classmates and classroom equipment, for example. Those grades were recorded, compiled, and sent home periodically in the form of a report card. Report card day was either looked forward to, or dreaded, depending on how you performed as a student.

The grading system is a powerful tool. It’s there in black and white….there is no longer a question of how you are doing; you either excel, need to put forth more effort, or you are smack dab in the middle; an average student. Bottom line….you know where you stand, what you have to work on, where your strengths lie, whether or not your hard work has paid off, and whether you’ve shown improvement.

So let’s see….how do our report cards stack up? In the subjects of FAMILY, SELF, GOALS, MONEY, and WORK, give yourself a grade: A, B, C, D or F. Be sure to take some time and really be honest with yourself. Are you excelling in any one area? Do you need to work a little harder on another? Maybe you are just riding the fine line of mediocrity; doing just enough to get by? Are you satisfied with your grades or do you feel you need to make some changes? It sometimes doesn’t take much effort to make some small improvements.

And, don’t forget that Gold Star. You deserve extra credit for participation, attempting something new, or taking steps toward a goal! Sometimes it’s the Gold Stars, that when added together make the difference between an F or an A+.

The Soul Sisters

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Choices Suck

Posted on March 13, 2012 by The Soul Sisters

Choices SuckIt’s great to have a choice, right? I mean, the power of choice is one of our most precious freedoms. It’s what separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom after all. That’s what we tell ourselves anyway.

The reality of the situation…Well, I’m going to venture to say that most people actually hate choices, and avoid making them at every opportunity. Ultimately, it’s the choices we make that put the responsibility in our lives, and our own happiness squarely on our shoulders.

Everything in life is a choice left to us; the job we accept, the spouse we marry, the schedules we keep. But what do we tend to do? We make choices that are not right for us. We choose what society thinks is right, what our husband thinks is right, or what our children think is right. And that’s where it begins…Instead of choice being one of our greatest freedoms it becomes one of our strongest captors.

We blame our circumstances and situations for our problems and hardships because it’s easier if we pretend that we don’t have a choice in the matter. Instead of becoming the hero of our own story we become the victim; full of anger, complaints, resentment, and sadness.

We tell ourselves that for one reason or another, we aren’t able to make the choices that others are able to make. They’re lucky or special and we’re the ones that got stuck with what we got. Somehow we confused making “tough” choices with having “no” choices and as a result we do what’s easy, play it safe, try to make (or keep) others happy, and instead of loving choices…we hate them.

It’s time to exercise your freedom to choose and to learn to love every opportunity you have to make a conscious, honest choice, whether it is difficult or otherwise. It’s the only path to fulfilling your wildest dreams!

So you’ve got a decision to make…You can either read this post, applying the message to your own life, and start making conscious and powerful choices, or you can choose to skim this text and quickly decide that your life is different and this lesson doesn’t apply to you. The choice is yours. Which will it be?

The Soul Sisters

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