Monthly Archives: June 2011

Teaching What’s Right

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Teaching What's RightWe’re continually bombarded with advice about parenting; seems like you can’t get far these days without hearing some sort of report or recommendation. Advice comes from Dr. Phil saying to increase communication, and from Parenting Magazine saying not to bribe too much. Now my personality being what it is, I take everything to heart and try to apply any good suggestions to my personal life.

I hear that reading to your children improves their literacy in the future and so I read to them. I hear that they need to be eating more fruits and vegetables, to which I say, “Bring on the green beans”. I just heard the other day that children are hearing “I love you” less these days, so here come the “I love you’s”. It really goes on and on, and the list gets longer and longer. Seems there’s so much to keep track of in the quest to be the “perfect parent”.

And then I heard it; the mother of all parenting advice! This advice makes remembering all the other advice unnecessary. It’s really very easy but it will guide you from this day forward. The advice: Simply ask yourself every night, “What did I teach my children today?”

It’s no surprise that children learn from example, and everyday is jam-packed full of learning. From the moment they wake up until the moment they go to bed, they are examining, questioning, and remembering everything.

So what are we teaching our children each day? Are we telling our son that the computer is more important than his questions? Are we portraying the role of a disempowered woman to our daughter? Maybe we’re showing them that living in a state of overwhelm and clutter is normal? In our relationships are we being role models of a loving and happy couple? Are we teaching them how to deal with disappointment in the right way? Are we teaching them to be safe and set limits? Are we showing them that our dreams and goals are important and within reach?

Spend some time contemplating what you taught your children today. Is it what you want to be teaching them? If not, it’s time to implement a new lesson plan.

The Soul Sisters

Tribute to Dad

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Tribute to DadHere at Soulspring Groups we spend a lot of time and focus on women. Having just celebrated Father’s Day, and with dads on our minds, we’d like to take the time to recognize the men who were instrumental in making us the women we are today; our fathers!

It’s really amazing everything we learn from our fathers. The “maybe not so important stuff” like not taking the first bite of an ice cream cone from the bottom, to the more important work ethic we carry into our first part-time jobs. I would say the most important though, is our fathers joining forces with our mothers to teach us about the kind of person we’d like to grow up to be. While I think back to everything I learned from my dad I can see as an adult how vital these tidbits of wisdom have been. Please allow me to share:

Never pass up the chance to strike up a conversation with a stranger. By observing my dad over the years I’ve come to discover the wonderful things that come from meeting new people. Maybe they have the scoop on the best place to find burgers in town, maybe they’ll offer to take you on a tour of the area, or maybe you’ll just walk away feeling happy that you had a connection with someone. Be friendly; not so difficult of a task, right? So next time you’re pumping gas or standing at the supermarket husking sweet corn, say hi to the person next to you.

Keep your sense of humor. I was blessed to get my Dad’s sense of humor. A little corny at times but we’re always the first and last ones laughing. Always look for the comedy in things and you’ll make life that much more fun.

Use a lot of paper when working through a problem. This originally started out to apply to algebra. My dad would constantly remind us to use a lot of paper and lay out the equation and our figuring in a neat and organized manner. But what about using this idea for all problems in life? Sit down and write your problem out…and use a lot of paper.

Never pass up an opportunity because of fear. I can think back to more than a few fun experiences we got to do all because Dad wasn’t afraid to go for it. When I feel myself sinking into fear I sometimes ask myself, “What would Dad do?” And more than likely the answer is, “He would have gone for it!”

Here’s to all the dads out there (especially our dad)..
Thank you for all your love, support, and wisdom throughout the years. Thank you for raising such happy and empowered daughters. We love you and are so very blessed!

The Soul Sisters

Women’s Empowerment Tip: Power from No

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If you think this is another article about prioritizing and learning to gracefully say no to some of the many requests we receive as women, you’re in for a bit of a surprise. I’m not going to be sharing about saying no, but rather getting no’s.

Why would we want to hear the word no? After all, don’t we spend a lot of time avoiding that negative word? I know it seems crazy, but bear with me.

What if the word no wasn’t as negative as we believe? What if the word no was actually a gateway to positivity, empowerment and all that we want from life?

O.k., now that I have your attention…I have a theory and I challenge you to think about this in your own life. I notice that when I have a request and need to ask for something from another, I tend to make the request in my own mind, and then as if I know how the other party will respond, I give myself the answer. If I think the other person will say yes, I tend to move forward and make my request and of course the outcome is as I imagined and my request is granted.

But sometimes, and maybe more often than I care to admit, I hear the word no as the reply to this back and forth exchange going on in my head. Worse yet, this no is followed by a barrage of reasons why my plea couldn’t possibly be granted. I feel a sense of disappointment, and to save myself from rejection give up on the whole idea.

Then it occurred to me; why am I assuming I know how the other person is going to respond? Why do I believe they will decline my plea? Why am I afraid of that little, two letter word? What am I withholding from myself and my life, by so easily accepting anything other than a yes to my need?

As women we are so accustomed to granting the wishes of others, but how often do we make a request on our own behalf? I don’t think the average woman asks for enough. Maybe we don’t think we’re deserving, maybe we don’t want to be demanding, or maybe we’re just afraid to hear a no.

So I’m implementing a self-imposed challenge, and I invite you to join me in my quest for no’s (3 no’s a day to be exact). I’m still planning to rehearse my requests in my head, but instead of hearing a no, I’m going to hear a yes and experience the happiness and gratitude upon hearing my need affirmed. Now for the important part; I’ll actually follow-through on my request. Regardless of whether I get the yes I’m expecting, or the no I feared, at least I’ll have asked and I’ll know that I’m receiving all that is possible for me.

The worst that can happen; I hear a no. But that will be overshadowed by the number of wishes granted to me; many of which I would have never had the courage to ask for before!

Three no’s a day will be my goal. To me that’s the magic number to know that I’m asking for enough from life.

The Soul Sisters

More Words to Change Your Life

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Soulspring Groups' Word of the WeekOur regular readers know that on Facebook and Twitter, Wednesday is reserved for our WOW’s (a.k.a.: Word of the Week).  Yes, each Wednesday we post a new word, which on the surface may seem very ordinary.  But, once you read the definition, you see that we’ve given each a new and “empowered” twist!  Our new meanings offer a valuable life lesson and some good food for thought!

Last month’s words were especially powerful!  Here’s a summary…

INNERVIEW: No spelling error here! You’re probably familiar with the job “interview” and the benefits for company and job-seeker alike. After all, there’s no better way to get a feel for the compatibility of skills, experience, duties and responsibilities. And, there’s a certain amount of preparation that goes into the interview too, as questions and answers are prepared and rehearsed, resumes are updated, scenarios are imagined and the negotiables are finalized. Funny isn’t it…all the time we spend on preparing for the job-interview, yet few of us do much to prepare for our most important job, the job of empowered, passionate, and abundant living! That’s where the “innerview” comes in!

What is it you hope to accomplish in this life? What skills and talents can you bring to the world? Where are you willing to negotiate?  You’ll be amazed at where a little self-inquiry can lead…Renewed purpose, crystal-clear focus, happiness, peace and contentment…the life of your dreams!

NIGHTLIFE: For most, the first thing to come to mind when we think of nightlife is going out, crazy times, whooping it up with friends. But we’re willing to bet that your nightlife reality is more about juggling the many kid activities, scrambling around doing housework, or retiring to the sofa for an evening spent as a couch potato. We hear ya, we know you’re tired! But instead of shrugging off precious evening-time, how about partaking in a few more empowering activities? Evening hours are the only chance most of us get to fulfill our self-care quota for the day. So, tonight, start by creating a self-care activities list for yourself, and then commit to doing one thing on your list at least three evenings a week (or more if you’re up for the challenge).

They don’t have to be time-consuming activities…even simple self-care tasks like 15 minutes spent journaling, reading before bed, a hot bath, or cup of tea, count! The important thing is that you spend a few minutes regularly focused just on YOU! Go ahead, you’ll thank us for it!

ANTIDOTE: According to Webster’s an antidote counteracts the effects of a poison. Before you think you aren’t exposed to any poison and so an antidote is unnecessary, you better think again! What about those negative thoughts? Poison! What about those limiting beliefs? Poison! What about the blame, excuses, and fear? Poison…Poison…Poison!

It’s crucial for us to have a well-stocked supply of our own personal antidotes. They’re the things that keep you from sliding down that slippery slope of negativity, depression, and lifeless living! So what’s your antidote? Journaling, prayer, a long hot bath, a walk in nature, the support of your Soulspring Group? Create your list of antidotes now so you’re prepared in case of an emergency!

SCORCHED: I’m sure it’s happened to all of us at one time or another; our spectacular recipe gets forgotten and left a bit too long on the stovetop without being stirred. Before we know it, it’s scorched!

But what does scorched have to do with empowerment? Well, consider how you feel when you sit complacent for too long, without a mix, mingle or shake-up, and your dreams, passions and goals get left unattended…you get stuck to the bottom of life!

It’s time to give things a little stir before it’s too late and your life turns into something dark and dried up beyond recognition! Muster up some courage and take that leap of faith, do that thing you’ve been saving for “someday”, get those activities on the calendar before the year flies by. Unlike a scorched recipe, you can stir things up before the excitement of life dries out.

Follow us on Facebook or Twitter so you don’t miss a single WOW Wednesday!  And spread the words to your friends with a “Share” or a retweet!  You never know who you might inspire as a result!